Abortion Rights

Cindi Dean Wafstet
6 min readMay 10, 2022

I’m old enough to remember when birth control was not available for married women, let alone a single teenage girl. There were condoms, but there was a specific stigma attached to using them. Abortion, of course, was illegal, but nothing could ban it. Unwanted pregnancy was the sole responsibility of girls and women. Men and boys pressured their female partners into giving in to allowing him to fuck them. Comments like “If you loved me, you would do this for me.” or “if you don’t let me, I will have blue balls and be in terrible pain. Do you want me to suffer like that?” Or, in my case, he just hit me twice and continued to rape me daily. I finally got pregnant. I was 14. I was in denial about it all until I eventually miscarried. I had friends who became pregnant at that young age too. One got married after the end of the 8th grade. One went to an unwed mother’s home and gave up her baby for adoption. Another had an illegal back-alley abortion. It was botched so badly that she could never have children afterward. Of course, nothing happened to the “fathers”. My friend, who got married at age 15, her husband beat and abused her almost daily. These situations didn’t help anyone.

Did keeping abortion illegal help anyone, the mothers or the babies? While two babies were born, it didn’t mean they were safe. One child was offered for adoption and probably didn’t learn they were adopted until they were adults. Another child was brought into an unstable family where the father was physically and emotionally abusive and ended up in prison. The child in question followed his father’s footsteps by becoming an underaged father at age 15, abused the mother and the child, and eventually ended up in prison as well. And the young girl whose abortion left her unable ever to have children again? How did that help anyone?

In 1973, Roe vs. Wade successfully argued that the law against the right to abortion was unconstitutional, making abortions legal for the first time. For nearly 50 years, conservative Christians have been trying to overturn that ruling.

They claim they want to stop abortions to save the lives of unborn children; that they are pro-life. But that is not true. They don’t care about what happens to those children after they are born. They don’t care if mothers die while getting illegal back-alley abortions. No, this movement of theirs is about control. They are firstly controlling the lives of women and making them into living incubators. But it goes further than that. They wish to keep women pregnant, uneducated, and living a life of poverty to keep them quiet and obedient, and to do this; they will next ban all forms of birth control, including condoms. After this is accomplished, they will overturn the law that legalized same-sex marriage and then inter-racial marriage — and finally overturn the 14th and 19th Amendments that will end the rights of every one of color and all women, including conservative Christian women. They will criminalize unmarried sex by anyone, even calling gay sex sodomy again. Ironically, they will not ban Viagra or hold men responsible for an unwanted pregnancy. They also wish to silence anyone who is not a conservative Christian, especially Atheists, so that the United States becomes a True Christian Nation as they have long proclaimed; a Theocracy.

Women are held responsible for every part of pregnancy, either preventing it or accepting it. So many men refuse to take responsibility for any aspect of it. It’s women who use contraceptives or insist on men using condoms. If women or girls get “knocked up,” most men walk away from the problem and let the woman deal with the repercussions of an unwanted pregnancy. To even get the man to take some responsibility for the child, women have to obtain a paternity test and take the guy to court so a judge can hand down a ruling. Often they don’t. Like in the case of rape, judges are too often reluctant to “ruin a young man’s life’.

Yet “men are fertile (if he doesn’t have fertility issues) 100% of the time. Women are fertile once a month for a few days.”

Men are responsible for 100% of unwanted pregnancies. Men could theoretically impregnate a dozen women a day every day of the month. Women can only become pregnant once every 9–10 months. So why aren’t men responsible for every part of conception, gestation, labor, delivery, and childcare? Financially AND physically.

“They’re taking away women’s rights over their bodies & we are being FORCIBLY held accountable for YOUR sperm! Nobody is holding men accountable in the same way! Y’all can go 18 years & never pay a dime towards that child you made & not be jailed for abandoning your duties to that sperm that made a child!” But can, and if some of these states have their way, women will pay for it, sometimes with their lives.

I received this letter from the state Representative of this area today, and I have also attached my response:

‘Dear Ms. Wafstet,

Thank you for contacting me about abortion. I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts with me.

I believe life begins at conception, and as such, it is our responsibility to protect it. Constitutional protection should be afforded to all Americans regardless of age, health, or condition of dependency, including unborn children at every stage of their biological development. To that end, I have continually supported legislation that protects life from conception through death.

Every life is a gift, and every human life is a story that must be protected. This belief was only further solidified when I became a mom. My son Cole was born with Down Syndrome. Today, he is an active, fun-loving 9-year-old, and a constant reminder to all who meet him that even when the odds are stacked against you, everyone should be afforded the opportunity to reach their full potential. Unfortunately with abortion, far too many stories go untold.

Though we may disagree on this, know that as your advocate in Congress, my top priority is to listen to you, find common ground, and lead on solutions people in Eastern Washington can count on. Please stay in touch.

‘So you advocate forcing women to continue a pregnancy that they might not be able to handle physically, emotionally, mentally, or financially, all because of your own personal beliefs? You do realize that your beliefs relate only to yourself and not anyone else. If you don’t believe in abortion, then fine, don’t have one. But you can’t force others to live by your beliefs. How would you feel if someone came on and demanded all pregnancies need to be aborted, because of their personal religious beliefs? It’s the other side of the same coin.

You may think that this is simply a case of agreeing to disagree, but it’s much more than that. It’s the right of each woman to decide what to do with her own body and pregnancy. Government and religion have no business in being a part of it. It’s between the woman, her partner, and her own personal beliefs (and not yours) with input from her doctor.

The word “abortion” covers a large umbrella of pregnancy concerns. According to way too many religious politicians, it means I had no right to the D&C I had after the miscarriage of my son at five months. To some, that miscarriage would have been seen as my fault and, therefore, “an abortion.” Would the government have had me arrested after one or the other? Ectopic pregnancies that require surgery would be considered an abortion. And these are just some of the situations. The mother would most likely die in each case, with the baby not saved anyway. How is that any sense “pro-life”?

You were elected to serve all of the citizens of this area, not just the ones who share your religion and beliefs. Agreeing to disagree will cause a lot of women (and babies) to die needlessly.’

Imagine if we had a government that demanded that all pregnancies be terminated unless approved beforehand. Imagine if this same government outlawed all sexual activity (including masturbation), and anyone caught would be arrested. Anyone who became pregnant from this lawless activity would be put to death. Sound farfetched? It’s similar to what some states are doing with abortion RIGHT NOW. George Lucas even made a science fiction movie about illegal sexual activity and unlawful pregnancy. It’s called THX-1138.

The future is now.

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Cindi Dean Wafstet

Writer, reader, teacher, student… Daughter, Mother, Grandmother, Great-Grandmother, Widow Resident of Washington State https://moondancepages.com/